Austin Sumter, a twelve year old from Waukomis, tore through the snowman wrapping paper on Christmas morning to find the Xbox 360 he’d been hoping for, but he also got something extra. Stuck to the box was the blood coagulated and half rotting thumb of Bernita Franklin, the woman whose hands Austin’s mother allegedly tore the video gaming system away from at 5:00 a.m. on Black Friday at Enid’s Wal-Mart Super Store. According to Ms. Franklin, she in fact was the first one to have possession of the box in question, which happened to be the last one in stock at the advertised sale price. From there, her memory is sketchy, as she apparently passed out from what was, at the time, an undetermined searing pain on her right hand. When questioned, the other black Friday shoppers were seemingly unaware of the collapsed woman on the floor and the large pool of blood forming around her body, due to the amazing selection and price of the iPod Touch right next to the unconscious Bernita Franklin.
Despite being seen leaving her home with a box cutter at 3:30 a.m. on Black Friday morning, no charges were filed against Austin‘s mother, Valarie Sumter, due to lack of evidence. Mrs. Sumter claimed to have no knowledge of the severed digit belonging to Bernita Franklin until Christmas morning when Austin opened the present. “Since we knew the thumb was too deteriorated to be reattached,” Said Austin’s mother, “it was really like two gifts in one, we gave the thumb to Dixie, our Pomeranian.”
The rest of the family agreed that it was indeed Dixie’s favorite holiday treat, as she ignored the Beggin Strips Santa left, and excitedly rolled around on the bloated thumb for twenty minutes. After thoroughly covering most of her body in the stench of death, she gnawed on the decomposing thumb for several hours. When the family convened to the dining room table for Christmas dinner, Dixie continued to savor her treat from underneath the table. “It was awesome!” said Austin, “Just as my dad and I were doing the wish bone thing, she bit through a knuckle or some cartilage or something and it made this popping noise…it was cool.”
Eventually Dixie hid the remaining tarsal bone in the basket of hats and mittens next to the hall-tree in the entryway of the family’s home. “It was adorable,” reflected Austin’s mother, “Even the happiness that our pets experience at Christmas can give us the opportunity to relish the true joy of giving.”